Whistling in the Dark

Yet another reason why I don't get tattooed.

Posted on 2005.02.10 at 15:52

I've only rarely been tempted by tattoos. I think they can look very nice... well, on women. But I'm not equipped to judge men, so don't blame me there. Larger amounts of tattooing (particularly on men, because... well, see last sentiment) alternately skeeves me or, if I'm a good friend of said man, means I call them "Carney folk."

Please note, my best friend in the entire world is the most heavily tattooed man in the world. He can also break me into very small pieces. No one ever said being a smartass was safe. I have many other friends addicted to skin-ink. I don't mean to insult them. (Well, okay -- when I call Frank and John Carney Folk I mean to insult them. But to be fair, they insult me back.)

But the other reason is... the tattoos I am tempted by are just plain wrong.

When I was young, before it became a cliche, I was tempted to get a bar code. After that, I got tempted by getting a nutritional information label on my shoulder. You know. "Number of servings. Calories. Fat grams per serving. Vitamin A." That kind of thing.

Just now, I read about a person who had wings tattooed on their shoulderblades, like angel's wings. My immediate thought was "man, I should get a tattoo of two jagged scars, with red along them, from where the wings got torn off."

So help me, I'm still tempted.

This is why I won't ever get tattooed.

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Comments:

dansr at 2005-02-10 21:03 (UTC) (Link)

::deep sigh::

I just love you.

::grin::

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freakfest at 2005-02-10 21:16 (UTC) (Link)

I love you, too.

BTW, John wanted to get a toe-tag tattooed on top of his foot. He's a freak.

So ... do you think I should get my Art Nouveau dragonfly next? Base of my neck? Wanna come with me and hold my hand? *giggles and smooches you*

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mishamish at 2005-02-10 21:28 (UTC) (Link)

Uhm... dude... I know it didn't come out well in black-and-white, but... check out the second panel of This comic.

Atleast you're not alone in that thought. :-D

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demiurgent at 2005-02-11 13:51 (UTC) (Link)

Aw man. I'm not even original. ;)

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qwantz at 2005-02-10 21:40 (UTC) (Link)

Dude.

http://www.qwantz.com/tattoos/

Go on, give me an excuse to update; you know you want to.

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ocarina at 2005-02-10 21:48 (UTC) (Link)

lol!

My rule is you should never get a tatoo without first deciding what it will be, where it will be, and still wanting it after a year. It took me years to come up with an idea and I'm still a few months short of my deadline and still liking it. But I wouldn't ever want to regret it, so I gotta make sure I want it.

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indigoskynet at 2005-02-11 06:30 (UTC) (Link)

Good rule of thumb. I took eight years deciding and studying up on it before I got my three.

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dvandom at 2005-02-10 22:07 (UTC) (Link)

But if you get a nutritional information tattoo and then your weight changes significantly, then you're in violation of truth in labeling laws!

(This post sold by weight, not volume.)

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airsick_moth at 2005-02-10 22:24 (UTC) (Link)

I never want a tattoo because there's nothing I'll ever like that consistently. Stuff like the busted wings thing, you'll get tired of it. I would have to get one that says "Food When I'm Hungry" or "Soft Bed" or other things I'll never get sick of.

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corsetress at 2005-02-10 22:27 (UTC) (Link)

O my Darling Man, what are we to do with you? That sounds like a wonderful piece of ink you have thought of. Fallen angel. The bar code could be your SSN. I had thought at one time to get the hazerdous materiels logo done right at the nape of my neck. Figured that would be more than enough warning for anyone...... then I figure what is the fun in warning. (grin). Lisa and I would go with you. We will hold your hand, speak softly to you. Give you sweet kisses...... come on you know you want to..... come to the dark side. Or you could have Frank and John and Mason take you............................................

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rabbi_thor at 2005-02-11 00:01 (UTC) (Link)

And I'll come along to point, laugh, and call you a little sissy-baby!

*evil grin*

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rabbi_thor at 2005-02-11 00:00 (UTC) (Link)

Bro, maybe the most heavily tattooed man in your world, but not in the entire world. Check back in about twenty years, maybe we can talk then!

Now, like I said, keep yer damn hands inside the car, leave the friggin' bar down, and no standin', or I'm feeding you to the bearded lady. She thinks yer real purdy.....

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kateisozzy at 2005-02-11 00:15 (UTC) (Link)

Man, I have such a thing for drawing tattoos. Nothing really detailed or mundane... more of the abstract tribal-y stuff or odd icons (like the !-in-a-triangle, or...hell, one of my characters has an ellipsis under her left eye).

I could never get one for real, because I am a wuss, but if work weren't an issue and I wore more sleeveless shirts I would probably do some permanent-marker-ing like a dork.

They actually have these sets of temporary tattoos that are just words, in a typewritery font. Phrases, literary quotations, that sort of thing. It's like wearable magnetic poetry. With, uhm, possibly less-than-innocent uses (context is a beautiful and terrible thing).

They need to make semipermanent tattoos, I think. Make it like hair dye: sure, you can commit, but not *completely*. I want frivolous cosmetic science to suit *my* whims for a change, dammit.

(I think my icon would make a neat tattoo. Right on the upper arm. Aww yeah.)

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archangelbeth at 2005-02-11 00:57 (UTC) (Link)

Henna lasts for a while. A friend of mine got calla lilies henna-painted on her hands. Habbalite-style...

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kateisozzy at 2005-02-11 02:51 (UTC) (Link)

Yeah, I did think of that after I posted. Ah well.

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mrbankies at 2005-02-11 00:52 (UTC) (Link)

Give in to the tempation and join the dark side dude. Else, we might have to arrange an "accident" for you when you ride the Ferris Wheel.

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weds at 2005-02-11 02:08 (UTC) (Link)

You could just get your back scarred.

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shaycaron at 2005-02-11 06:20 (UTC) (Link)

Brilliant!

I always thought it'd be cool to get a patch of wires and gears tattooed on my arm, as if I were a robot with a panel opened onto my inner workings.

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indigoskynet at 2005-02-11 06:22 (UTC) (Link)

I have the angel wings between my shoulderblades.

And I would dearly love to have them colored in because the tattooing itself was great for breaking up muscle tension that hangs out there for months at a time.

And I've seen the bloody wing-tear wounds before too.

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demiurgent at 2005-02-11 13:54 (UTC) (Link)

Well, you are an angel.

And clearly, there are people as odd in the head as I am, out there. ;)

I don't think I've ever heard of Tattooing as Acupuncture therapy before, but it makes a lot of sense.

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indigoskynet at 2005-02-11 14:46 (UTC) (Link)

*blush*

I'm not sure where I got the idea, but it worked, which makes me happy.

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2005.02.10 @ 15:52

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Yet another reason why I don't get tattooed.

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